Argo-bat yourself?

The look on Alan Arkin's face in this screencap from Argo really captures my feelings about this announcement.

The look on Alan Arkin’s face in this screencap from Argo really captures my feelings about this announcement.

Tonight, I came across the little piece of news that Ben Affleck is going to be taking on the role of Batman.

Where do I begin with this?

Let us start, with the fact that this will most likely require a semi-reboot of some kind. As there is really no way to confuse Christian Bale and him. So, didn’t we just *do* Batman? Didn’t that just make a lot of money? Also, I know they’re touting for vessel for this new Batman to be as a sequel to Man of Steel, and that feels incredibly awkward as well.

Affleck, I love you dude. I really do. You’ve got a great sense of humor, and in the right roles show your acting chops. But I don’t know if I want you anywhere near a comic book role again. I think it’s not good for you, or anyone else. I’ll stand corrected if you really just knock this one out of the park, but until then I brace myself and remember the horror that was Daredevil. The horror that was everything connected to Daredevil. Anyone remember that little movie, Elektra? The movie that managed to somehow turned a kick ass character played by the beautiful Jennifer Garner into absolutely no fun? A fun vacuum actually. It’s a curse.

Apparently this is connected to the plans to execute a Batman versus Superman scenario onscreen. Please no. I know that The Avengers doing so well has tempted you to squeeze the fan base for every last penny, but I don’t believe it’s going to work. Not like Avengers. Avengers was fun, Iron Man, Thor and Captain America fighting each other for a minute or two, hilarious. But the whole movie wasn’t based around it. Also, Superman would win. Because he doesn’t break. And one little slip up of Batman’s no doubt top of the line kryptonite-o-wear fists of fury and throwing star batwings, and Superman kicks his ass. Because he’s from outer space, and is inherently stronger and better than everyone else here. Especially Bruce Banner.

The whole thing that made Batman awesome, which was a normal dude being willing to risk it all for his city with the aid of some super gadgets, doesn’t work opposite a ‘Superman’. Especially when he just got his ass handed to him once, by a dude who was just normally super strong, and happened to not feel any pain. Just a little legend by the name of Bane. Oh yeah, wasn’t he just in the very last movie that just came out last year? !

Now I know there could potentially be a lot of comic-book based canon rebuttal here. But I say this: comic books do not naturally translate to the screen well. This is why something as simple as The Hulk, took so many tries before they got it right.

All this said, if they make this movie, and it’s amazing, you’ll be the first ones to hear me say it right here on this blog. Because at the end of the day, it’s a win win if they pull it off.

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2 thoughts on “Argo-bat yourself?

  1. I like Ben Affleck.. I’ve erased Daredevil from my mind (as with Ghostrider). Or tried to. With this I just think… Why man? Why would you agree to this?! Everybody started to like and respect you again. Now you’re going to get a load of shit from the Internet nerds! Didn’t George Clooney warn you?!

    I hope he does well in this role.. but I’m having a heard time picturing him as either Batman or Bruce. He’s doesn’t have the lower face for the Batmask.
    In fact this whole movies sounds more and more like a terrible idea the more I hear about it.

    • Exactly. You’re either right for it or you’re not. If he turns out to be right, then great. But if not, it’s going to be painful. Batman is tough, it’s not for everyone. Oh Clooney. Clooney Batman, whoa. Whoever designed his bat suit is a fool. Nips for the loss.

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